Thursday, 11 December 2008

Genghis Kong vs. Article

Hello fans!

(and all the rest of you)

I'm afraid this is not going to be much of a post. I promised you a nice newsy update at the end of my last post, but the sad thing is there is not much news to tell. I have been going to school some days, not going to school on others. Doing homework some days, failing to achieve anything productive on others. I've been getting drunk at the weekends, and sometimes accidentally getting drunk on schoolnights too, but apart from a couple of fairly embarrassing/tedious episodes involving me falling asleep on the train home because I was drunk and waking up several hundred miles away from where I had hoped to be, not much of note has happened. I somehow managed to repeat this ridiculous process twice in a single weekend! I 'accidentally' went clubbing in Roppongi on the Friday night: left the club around 3/4am, finally got home at 11.30 (it's usually about an hour, at most). I spent Saturday nursing a brutal hangover, but somehow managed to let myself get talked into going clubbing AGAIN... It was actually a really good club, and the music was awesome (Dubstep an' ting), but yet again I somehow managed to completely fuck up getting home - left the club at 4am, got home around 1pm the next day. D'oh!

So that's about it. Other significant notes about my life:
  • I'm still not smoking - about 2 months, ish? I haven't even bothered keeping track.
  • I'm currently drinking heroic quantities of coffee every day
  • A sort of vaguely-healthy-eating/diet type thing which I had been pursuing has long since fallen by the wayside
  • I've been going to the gym thrice a week (6 times a fortnight) for the last month or two, which is nice
  • I'm falling way behind on Kanji and other homework
  • I've trimmed my moustache into a ridiculous Hulk Hogan/James Hetfield/Leather Dude out of The Village People big gay handlebar
  • I just cut my hair (I don't really know how it looks yet, but I think I might be balding rather disastrously)
Apart from that, natalatagwan to be honest. I've started doing some Christmas shopping. I've got some 'hilarious' (retarded) little nick-nacks to bring home for some of you lucky people. I've also just gone and bought myself my traditional Christmas bottle of Baileys. This has become something of a Christmas tradition of mine over the last few years, and it goes a little like this:
  1. As it approaches Christmas it occurs to me that I secretly quite like Baileys, and it is Christmas after all, so I go and buy myself a bottle of Baileys
  2. I pour myself a nice chilled glass of Baileys and watch Disney's Robin Hood or The Box of Delights or something similar
  3. I enjoy the delicious rich creaminess and wonder why I don't drink Baileys more often
  4. I finish my first Baileys and pour myself another. I gag on the cloying rich creaminess and, beginning to feel rather nauseous, I remember precisely why I don't drink Baileys more often
  5. I force myself to finish a whole bottle of gross, cloying, sickly-sweet Irish muck over a week or so
  6. I find out (too late) how many calories there are in a measure of Baileys and weep, swearing never to drink it again
  7. Until next year
So far, my bottle of Baileys remains untouched in the fridge, so I'm actually quite looking forward to it, but I'm sure within a day or two I will be ruing the day I decided to buy it. At least it's not as expensive here as it is in England.

Incidientally, yes, I have drunk Baileys from a shoe, but no, I don't want to go to a club where people wee on each other, thank you very much.

So anyway, not much going on. But that's not the real reason I wrote this post. The real reson is that one of my friends in Sheffield edits/produces/curates a sort of magazine. I guess you could call it an arts/culture/fashion/music/current affairs/amusing nonsense sort of magazine. It's called Article, presumably because that's what it contains. Anyway, I wrote an article for Article recently, and Article issue 4, featuring my article, has just been printed.

If you are in Sheffield, keep your eyes open for real live hard copies of Article, but for those of you living further afield it can be found online in an eco-friendly version here:
although as I type this, their myspace claims to be undergoing routine maintenance and is inaccessible. Should you have trouble with this one, please seek for the magazine here:

Mine is the cheery piece on suicide on page 26 (page 14 on the pdf because the pages are double-scanned), but you should definitely take a look at the rest of the magazine too because it's usually very entertaining (I haven't read this issue yet).

(Watch this video as you read the top of the third column of my article)

If you enjoyed anything you found written in Article, or even if you didn't, please go and list yourself as a 'fan' of Article magazine on facebook:

The more people sign up as fans, the more they can charge for advertising, the more money they get, the more content goes into the next issue. There's even talk of printing parts of it in colour, which is very exciting.

Now I'm about to something very unpleasant to all of you, but can I assure you that it's not my fault: blame Evil Ronnie for this one (I knew there was a reason his name's 'Evil').

Get ready for the Jingle Bass!!!

I apologise for that. Truly I do.

Much love,
Genghis Claus xxx

1 comment:

Up said...

get ready for the jingle baaaaaass